How do you know when it\u2019s time to consider assisted living for your aging parent?<\/p>\n
Whether you live a state away or just across town, it\u2019s never easy to witness your parents age. It can be challenging to know when it\u2019s time to intervene or have a conversation, but there will likely come a time when it becomes more clear that mom or dad probably shouldn\u2019t live alone anymore.<\/p>\n
What should you be looking out for, though? Here are seven tell-tale signs it may be time to consider assisted living for your aging parent.<\/p>\n
Keeping a clean home takes both desire and mobility. If mom or dad begins to lose either one, it\u2019s important to pay attention. Maybe you start to notice dirty dishes piling up, groceries left on the counter, spoiled food in the fridge, or even spills that haven\u2019t been cleaned up.<\/p>\n
Whether this happens because your senior parent has lost the physical capacity to wipe up a juice spill off the kitchen floor, or they\u2019ve simply stopped caring about how their home looks, if you notice a change in the cleanliness of their space, it\u2019s time to have a conversation.<\/p>\n
Perhaps you start to notice mom hasn\u2019t been keeping her hair cutting appointments anymore. Maybe dad hasn\u2019t been shaving. Sometimes this is due to no longer taking pride in their appearance, and sometimes it\u2019s more of a symptom of forgetfulness, or even losing the fine motor skills to apply makeup anymore, for example.<\/p>\n
Of course, it\u2019s not realistic to expect your aging parent to always look like they\u2019ve stepped out of a catalog. But if you begin to notice personal hygiene and self care declining, it could be a sign that it\u2019s time to consider having a conversation about how you can support them.<\/p>\n
A concern we often hear at Benton House is whether elderly parents still living at home are getting the necessary nutrition. Maybe you notice they\u2019re not keeping the right types of food in the kitchen anymore.<\/p>\n
There could be several reasons for this, ranging from choosing more packaged food because they\u2019ve lost interest in cooking to losing the cognitive awareness around what foods they need to stay healthy.<\/p>\n
Good nutrition is crucial to maintain health during the aging process, and a top reason it may be time to consider talking to your parent about assisted living.<\/p>\n
Often the reason someone picks up the phone to call us here at Benton House is that mom or dad has had an emergency that has left the whole family shaken up. Sometimes a fall or other accident is a symptom of something that needs medical attention, but it can also be helpful to consider whether anything else could have contributed.<\/p>\n
Is the house unkempt, which caused mom to trip over shoes in the middle of the floor? Perhaps having someone tidy up could help. Do you notice medications in disarray?<\/p>\n
It may be time to find a way to ensure mom or dad is taking the medicine they need to feel their best. Whatever the reason, a fall or other medical situation can often mean it\u2019s time to consider whether it could be time for assisted living, where you could trust your aging parent would feel more safe.<\/p>\n
Are you getting the sense, or have you found out directly, that perhaps mom isn\u2019t telling the truth? Sometimes pride can keep our aging parents from fully sharing their reality with us, for fear of judgment \u2014 or even that something may get taken away from them.<\/p>\n
Whether they\u2019ve fallen victim to elder fraud, their license is expired and they\u2019re nervous they won\u2019t pass the test, or they\u2019re feeling depressed on a regular basis, there are many reasons mom or dad may hide the truth.<\/p>\n
While it may be uncomfortable, attempting to have candid conversations with your elderly parents about how they\u2019re really doing can go a long way in understanding whether there is a way you can support them.<\/p>\n
Keeping an eye on mom or dad\u2019s overall mood is important. It doesn\u2019t always mean it\u2019s time for assisted living \u2014 there are many reasons it can be hard to keep spirits up as we age. Friends are no longer with us, we often can\u2019t partake in hobbies we once loved, and even aches and pains can become a constant source of low mood.<\/p>\n
While we can\u2019t solve every problem, sometimes there are simple solutions that can bring your aging parent relief and a lighter spirit.<\/p>\n
Helping mom or dad adjust to a new hobby that fits with their growing limitations as they age, for example, can go a long way. Sometimes, though, a sustained depressed mood can signal that it\u2019s time to consider support from a professional.<\/p>\n
Getting exercise is important at any age, and even more so as we get older. Exercise can support heart health, reduce cancer risk, improve daily task abilities, boost mood, and even enhance cognition for seniors.<\/p>\n
If mom\u2019s quit dressing herself well, for example, it could be because she\u2019s become unsteady \u2014 and she could be unsteady because she is losing motor function, which exercise can keep at bay. One of the major positives of assisted living is having a community as well as facilities that make exercising both easy and enjoyable for seniors.<\/p>\n
If you\u2019re noticing any of these signs in your aging parent, you may be considering assisted living. It makes sense, because most assisted living communities are designed to support seniors around each one of these points, from nutrition to personal hygiene.<\/p>\n
But how do you talk with mom or dad about this potentially sensitive topic?<\/p>\n
Approaching the subject successfully depends on the individual\u2019s fear. Sometimes a senior doesn\u2019t realize that assisted living is a lifestyle choice, not a nursing home.<\/p>\n
For example, at Benton House we don\u2019t ask residents to start yearly leases. Instead, living here is month to month, so it doesn\u2019t feel permanent if they don\u2019t want it to. It\u2019s also easy to come for a short-term respite stay, which can be anywhere from a week up to 60 days, to see how this lifestyle works for them.<\/p>\n
If you could use support navigating talking about assisted living with your aging parents, we\u2019re always here to help.<\/p>\n